Personal transformation can occur several times during our lives. It is a sign of growth and it means that one chapter in our life is about to close and a new chapter is about to begin. It is a sign of change that already began occurring within you in response to the change you are experiencing or about to experience outside of yourself – for example, your job is about to change, you life circumstances, social circle, relationship, health, and so forth. As we enter a new phase of our lives, our mental state also goes through transformation.
In my life, I had several transformations, some are more significant than others. An example of significant transformation was immigration from Ukraine to Canada when I was 14. It was major because everything in my life has changed – the surroundings, where and how I lived, the language I was speaking, the school I went to, I lost all my friends at once and had to make new ones, and so forth. The second major transformation was when I got married – in addition to change in my relationship status, at the same time I moved out to a new place, started living with my husband (obviously) instead of my parents, the way of life has changed, and I also started a brand new job on day 2 after my wedding. In addition, after getting married most people I considered my friends have disappeared from my life (some faster than others). So again, I had to adjust the way I was thinking about myself and the world around me and adjust my attitude, behaviour and expectations. Since then, I had transformations that were not as major as the other 2 but I can feel when new change is about to take place.
So what are the signs that you are going through personal transformation? Keep in mind, transformation does not happen overnight, rather it takes months and can feel different from time to time, but when you look back you can certainly tell that it happened.
Signs of transformation or entering another phase of life:
- You feel restless. You notice everything around you, including the things that you did not think about much before – now they begin bothering you. Whether it is how you look, how you live or small decisions you make everyday – you start questioning them and looking for ways to improve or change. You also notice the people that you regularly interact with and notice their real personalities and how they treat you.
- You feel as you are about to jump from the cliff. It can feel as periods of calm and anxiety. Transformation occurs when you leave where you are behind and take the next step forward. It is only natural to be worried about the change but in your heart you feel confident and calm about upcoming change.
- You lose your fears. Things that used to be scary come natural to you and you begin enjoying them. It is also a sign that you are learning and growing and overcoming your fears through knowledge and new skills.
- You feel a mixture of being confident and being totally lost. Some days you know exactly where you are going and other days you can feel terrified and confused.
- You begin to be interested in new things that you did not care about before. You may suddenly develop an interest for certain books, topics, languages or hobbies.
- You begin forming new habits that make you feel good about yourself. It can be a change in your diet, physical activities or how you rest. Whatever it is, the change occurs not just because you are trying to improve but also because you realize what you can do differently to feel better, and once you do, it feels like it is a right thing to do.
- You begin meeting new people and forming new connections. The people that you interact with the most do shape your understanding of the world. For example, when I was going through the phase where I really hated my job and was bored there I formed friendship with 2 women who also hated it there – one of them was managing her not-for-profit organization during work hours and another one was looking for another job. The moment I found another job where I was happy to be I naturally began forming connections with people who were also happy to work there. I had the same experience when it comes to relationships – when I was unhappy in my relationships and met with my friends, we all would complain about each others’ boyfriends. The moment I was happy in my relationship, the friendship have seized and instead I formed friendship with others that were also happy in their relationships.
- You become curious about spiritual life. It can be exploring or getting more involved in specific religions, learning more about spiritual activities, forming new beliefs. This is your mind trying to make sense of new reality and using spiritualism to make new life more meaningful.
- You surprise yourself with your skills. I notice how I respond to something at work – whether it is about displaying my knowledge of a particular topic or just interacting with people – and then I see it from a side and realize that old me would not do or say those things not in a million of years! It also means you are continue to learn. A sign that you stopped learning is when you feel you know everything and you are actually bored – it means it is time for more challenging work!
- Your goals are changing regularly or you feel you can dream bigger than before. Whatever you thought was on the verge of being impossible just few years ago becomes within your reach.
- You form new values and develop new rules for your life that become your truths.