I have been feeling no motivation or energy for a while. In fact, I was stuck in this self -pity zone where everything you do is survive through the routine until next day when routine consumes you. I had many goals but no time or energy to even think about starting to work on them. Sounds familiar? Keep on reading…

Sadly, I was not just stuck in routine. I could not even manage the routine part. Organizing laundry, lunches, groceries, cleaning – everything was a fail. Nothing was done, done on time or organized in the way to get things done.

Then, one day, I had a deja vu. I remembered that I was already in this position when I started studying at university. The people that surrounded me told me it is very hard and the goal was to survive the first year. Not learn anything, not get good grades or secure internships, just survive barely above the water to pass the courses. And in my first year, I felt extremely exhausted, stressed and my marks were in mid sixties out of a hundred.

However, in the second year I did some research, looked around and realized that they are ways to get better, more organized, have more control and as a result, get better results. Suddenly my marks were in late 70s- early 80s. Did I get smarter suddenly or study more? No, and I also stared working at the same time, 25h a week. What changed was my perspective.

And here I was in this situation again, feeling sorry for myself for working full time and having to look after 1 toddler. Sure my manager has 5 kids and full time job as well. But she is a robot, right? (No, she is not. Just better organized). My energy levels were low, my house was a mess and I was just exhausted until I came to that realization. It is not that hard. There are single mothers out there. There are people with more kids and more than 1 job.

Then my mental programs started shifting. Instead of “my house will never be clean again”, I started thinking “how can I find time to clean it?”. Instead of feeling bad and celebrating feeling bad with food I started looking for opportunities and pockets of time. I am happy to report (or embarrassed to report?) that my place is cleaner than it has been for years – I even reorganized my kitchen. I got to do tasks I was not doing for months if not years, like reading and writing. We found time and opportunities to do date evenings with my husband (we were exhausted at first but we pulled through and even watched a 2h movie in 1 weekend!).

So, things are possible if you shift your perspective from feeling sorry to appreciating what you have but also seeing anything that was not achievable as easy to get. Then your brain will focus on how to get there and you will see magic happening. Happy getting your control back!